Lost November 6, 2008
Posted by .F in myPictures.add a comment
= Lost =
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Photographer: me
Location: The Shrine of Remembrance, Melbourne
Editings:
Saturation
Levels adjusted
Colors adjusted
Framed & Signature
The title is something that just popped in my mind so I’m not sure if it suits. I took this photo in a hurry because I wanted a natural look and I did not get her consent. I love street photos.
Emotions October 27, 2008
Posted by .F in myDays, myMusic.add a comment
This wasn’t originally sung by Destiny’s Child, but I like their version better. There are three sentences in the lyrics that kind of fit my feelings last week so I think it’s worth putting here LOL
You never see me fall apart
In the words of a broken heart
it’s just emotion taking me over
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Emotions
by. Destiny’s Child
It’s over and done
but the heartache lives on inside
And who’s the one you’re clinging to
instead of me tonight?
And where are you now, now that I need you?
Tears on my pillow wherever you go
I’ll cry me a river that leads to your ocean
You never see me fall apart
In the words of a broken heart
it’s just emotion taking me over
Caught up in sorrow
lost in the song
but if you don’t come back
Come home to me, darling
don’t you know there’s nobody left in this world tohold me tight
nobody left in this world to kiss goodnight
Goodnight, goodnight
I’m there at your side,
I’m part of all the things you are
But you’ve got a part of someone else
You’ve got to find your shining star
And where are you now, now that I need you?
Tears on my pillow wherever you go
I’ll cry me a river that leads to your ocean
You never see me fall apart
In the words of a broken heart
it’s just emotion taking me over
Caught up in sorrow
lost in the song
but if you don’t come back
Come home to me, darling
don’t you know there’s nobody left in this world tohold me tight
nobody left in this world to kiss goodnight
Goodnight, goodnight
And where are you now, now that I need you?
Tears on my pillow wherever you go
I’ll cry me a river that leads to your ocean
You never see me fall apart
In the words of a broken heart
it’s just emotion taking me over
Caught up in sorrow
lost in the song
but if you don’t come back
Come home to me, darling
don’t you know there’s nobody left in this world tohold me tight
nobody left in this world to kiss goodnight
Goodnight, goodnight
ducit Dominus October 24, 2008
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This past one week has been one week in which I learned a lot of things.
First of all, I was heartbroken.
Well, not really heartbroken as in rejected by the person I like. It’s just that I realised that this attraction that I’m feeling is not doing me any good. Also, because, in line with what I have been feeling but won’t admit, the person whose judgment I trust the most told me that he is just not the one for me (or at least, that i shouldn’t hope for him).
How does it feel to be told by someone you trust the most the thing that you least wanna hear? I must tell you, it doesn’t feel nice. It was a horrible feeling. But it was a wake up call. So I’m stepping back, or at least, I vowed to myself to step back.
I was feeling horrible inside for at least a day but as always, God was too kind to me. He reminded me on this resolution that I wrote during a seminar last July through ways that I never expected. Firstly, it was through my own dad’s sermon. It was a sermon on Jonah, and how like all of us always do, we shape our own “God” according to what we want. And one point that was talked about was regarding God’s will, and somehow the resolution that I made just flashed through my mind.
Resolved, to make God’s will mine.
Meaning: I want to follow whatever God’s will is wholeheartedly, not because it is forced on me, but because I am His servant only, and His will shall be mine as well.
The second part of His answer came during my KTB (bible study group) session this week, through the prayer of the preacher leading the session. We were talking about Psalm 127 in the opening of the session and then just suddenly when she prayed, she spoke some sentences which I will not be telling here but which just stroke me right on the heart. It is another answer that I got to calm my troubled heart.
And God’s reminder and answer did not stop there. I was going to the university the other day and while waiting for my parents in the city, I went to the bookshop, looking for this Beginner Latin book which I just couldn’t seem to find. I checked and checked the shelf again and after I gave up, I took this Latin phrase book and opened the book. And guess what sentence suddenly went highlighted on my sight?
ducit Dominus. The Lord leads.
I was stunned. For me now, this kind of problem seems to be a very silly problem in God’s sight. But still He cares that I cried. He cares that I’m troubled. He cares. And He reminded me of the most important thing: that He knows what is best for me and that He is in control of everything. I just have to follow His lead.
This week, I learned how to admit things that I don’t want to admit. I learned how it feels to be “heartbroken”. But above all, I learned more about His kindness; and I learned to be led by the best shepherd.
Beautiful October 8, 2008
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I haven’t been writing for quite long, but I will start doing that again probably next week – so many works to do this week. For now, just putting up this lyrics up…I happened to have the song from someone and I just love it…especially the first three lines of the song.
All goodbyes disappeared,
when I first set my eyes on you,
I found a world so pure and blue.
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Beautiful
by Alex Lloyd
All goodbyes disappeared,
when I first set my eyes on you,
I found a world so pure and blue.
Today, I vow to you,
that every little piece you see,
is coming from the heart of me.
You are so beautiful,
and you’re filling up my day,
with the things I can’t explain.
You are so beautiful,
and I’m holding on today,
yeah, we’re holding on,
we’re holding on.
Among the broke glass,
a road we’ve all been down before,
but this time there’s an open door.
A code so set a sealed,
where nothing is unbreakable,
to find strength of iron will.
Today, I vow to you,
that every little piece of me,
is coming from the heart of me.
You are so beautiful,
and you’re filling up my day,
with the things I can’t explain.
You are so beautiful,
and I’m holding on today,
yeah, we’re holding on,
we’re holding on.
Sweetest Goodbye September 16, 2008
Posted by .F in myMusic.add a comment
I always love Maroon 5’s songs, I haven’t listen to much of them but most of those that I’ve heard I love. And here’s one of them. The first two sentences kinda describe how I’m feeling (I know, I know, I’m a melancholy).
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Sweetest Goodbye
by Maroon 5
Where you are seems to be
As far as an eternity
Outstretched arms open hearts
And if it never ends then when do we start?
I’ll never leave you behind
Or treat you unkind
I know you understand
And with a tear in my eye
Give me the sweetest goodbye
That I ever did receive
Pushing forward and arching back
Bring me closer to heart attack
Say goodbye and just fly away
When you comeback
I have some things to say
How does it feel to know you never have to be alone
When you get home?
There must be someplace here that only you and I could go
So I can show you how I
Dream away everyday
Try so hard to disregard
The rhythm of the rain that drops
And coincides with the beating of my heart
I’ll never leave you behind
Or treat you unkind
I know you understand
And with a tear in my eye
Give me the sweetest goodbye
That I ever, ever, ever did receive
[x2]
How does it feel to know you never have to be alone
When you get home?
There must be someplace here that only you and I could go
So I can show you how I feel
September 11 September 11, 2008
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= September 11 =
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Photographer: me
Location: my house, Indonesia
Editings:
Saturation
Levels adjusted
Framed & Signature
This photo and manipulation was originally done 2 years ago in 2006, but I adjusted the levels again just now.
I was having lunch just now and I turned on my TV to see Dr Phil, and afterwards there was Oprah – and it was her special show in Sept 11, 2007 – and I realized that today is 7 years after the event of 9/11 (not exactly 7 years with the time difference and all but well…) so I decided that I’d put this picture up just to again remember the day when the world mourned.
Being a younger girl at the time (I was in my junior high at the time) and living quite far away, the only thing I remembered from the time is that I was still living in the other house (I have now moved to another one), and it was around 8PM that day and I felt so sleepy or sick that day so I decided to go to bed early. Around 9PM I was still awake and I heard my dad calling my mom to his room and I heard his TV on. I didn’t know what that was about until the next day when I saw the paper with the front page full of horrible pictures of the two towers and a big title on it: “America’s Doomed”.
From there on, I knew. Not much but well there’s no way you’d forget that kind of day I reckon, and I can’t imagine being one affected directly from the event. Listening to the first 5 mins of Oprah today, with her presenting some children of the victims, I can’t imagine being them having to live with the loss exposed to them every year of their lives.
7 years from the tragedy, the world has been affected greatly by the event. I was reminded on the question that the title of Philip Yancey’s book proposes, “Where is God when it hurts?”. I have yet to read the book so I have no idea about the answer. I personally don’t think that it is to my right to question Him on why He allows sufferings so I don’t really think much about it. But I guess whenever we see something like this, sometimes we just can’t help but to wonder.
If It Ain’t You September 10, 2008
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I know that is not the title of the song, but that part of the song is currently stuck in my mind for some reasons that I won’t be putting up here.
I don’t really listen to Alicia Keys but my best friend is a big fan of her. And I personally love this song of hers up till now.
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If I Ain’t Got You
by Alicia Keys
Some people live for the fortune
Some people live just for the fame
Some people live for the power, yeah
Some people live just to play the game
Some people think that the physical things
Define what’s within
And I’ve been there before
But that life’s a bore
So full of the superficial
[Chorus:]
Some people want it all
But I don’t want nothing at all
If it ain’t you baby
If I ain’t got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain’t got you, Yeah
Some people search for a fountain
That promises forever young
Some people need three dozen roses
And that’s the only way to prove you love them
Hand me the world on a silver platter
And what good would it be
With no one to share
With no one who truly cares for me
[Chorus:]
Some people want it all
But I don’t want nothing at all
If it ain’t you baby
If I ain’t got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain’t got you, you, you
Some people want it all
But I don’t want nothing at all
If it ain’t you baby
If I ain’t got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain’t got you, yeah
[Outro:]
If I ain’t got you with me baby
So nothing in this whole wide world don’t mean a thing
If I ain’t got you with me baby
For One More Day September 5, 2008
Posted by .F in myBooks, myDays, myPictures.add a comment
For One More Day =
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Photographer: me
Location: my auntie’s house, Indonesia
Editings:
Levels adjusted
Framed & Signature
It was a picture I took long time ago in 2006. I gave the title according to a book written by Mitch Albom on the same year, read it and love it. Just few days ago I saw Oprah’s show and there Albom was talking about the book so that’s why I decided to write about it.
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‘Every family is a ghost story . . .’
As a child, Charley Benetto was told by his father, ‘You can be a mama’s boy or a daddy’s boy, but you can’t be both.’ So he chooses his father, only to see him disappear when Charley is on the verge of adolescence. Decades later, Charley is a broken man. His life has been destroyed by alcohol and regret. He loses his job. He leaves his family. He hits rock bottom after discovering he won’t be invited to his only daughter’s wedding. And he decides to take his own life. Charley makes a midnight ride to his small hometown: his final journey. But as he staggers into his old house, he makes an astonishing discovery. His mother – who died eight years earlier – is there, and welcomes Charley home as if nothing had ever happened. What follows is the one seemingly ordinary day so many of us yearn for: a chance to make good with a lost parent, to explain the family secrets and to seek forgiveness
- Publisher’s review
I think Mitch Albom is one of the few authors that can make me cry when reading a book. I love “The Five People You Met in Heaven“, “Tuesdays with Morie” is my all time favorite, and now “For One More Day” – telling a story of a mother’s love, of second chances and of forgiveness. Basically as it says above in the review, it is about Charley who wanted to kill himself but when he was making his last journey home he met his mother, who was supposed to be dead, still alive; acting as if there’s nothing wrong – as if it was just an ordinary day for both of them.
I don’t remember the details very well now already but what I remember is one of the messages of the story, one that was mentioned in Oprah’s show as well: that if you got something you want to say to a person, say it before you never got a chance to say it again. Not many people got a second chance and that’s why we have to live as if it is our last day living.
Oprah asked people in her show if you could have one more day with someone, who would that person be and what would you do to spend the day with him/her? I haven’t lost someone important to me (and I’m grateful for that) so I can’t answer who but many people answered that they will just spend the day as however they usually spend it with the person they love – and tell them lots of times how much they mean to them. And although I myself find it a bit hard to express my love to someone, but I think it is important to say it to those people you love. And that’s one thing the book was talking about.
I personally think the book is awesome; everyone should read it. Especially those who have someone they love (I’m sure everyone have someone they love though…well…) and those who often take their (the people they love’s) love for granted.
Oprah was so amazed by Albom’s book that she produced a special movie based on the book aired I think only in ABC a year ago but I managed to find a link where you can watch it online. I watched it just now and although the quality of the movie itself isn’t good, but it still got the message. I’d still recommend the book more though.
Jeremiah 42-43 September 2, 2008
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I have just finished reading the book of Jeremiah few days ago for my 
quite time reading. It is a very nice book, although quite long but there’s quite some things that I learned from the book.
One part that I still remembered quite clearly from the book is this part of the book Jeremiah 42-43. In the previous parts, Jerusalem fell into the hand of Babylon under the reign of King Nebuchadnezzar. Then someone called Gedaliah was appointed as the governor of the land. Under his government, he managed to start gathering the scattered remnants of Israel. But one day he was assassinated by a man called Ishmael son of Nethaniah who came from the royal blood; although during his process of capturing the men he was failed by another man called Johanan.
Anyway, Jeremiah 42 started in a chaotic situation with Johanan leading the left people of Israel with their leader Gedaliah dead. They were afraid of the rage of Nebuchadnezzar because his appointed man was murdered. So they planned to flee to Egypt. However, before doing so under the lead of Johanan the Israelites came to the prophet Jeremiah, asking him to pray and ask God so He would let them know what they should do. And they PROMISED they would follow WHATEVER it is God wanted them to do (note this point cause it is important).
5 Then they said to Jeremiah, “May the LORD be a true and faithful witness against us if we do not act in accordance with everything the LORD your God sends you to tell us.
6 Whether it is favorable or unfavorable, we will obey the LORD our God, to whom we are sending you, so that it will go well with us, for we will obey the LORD our God.”
- Jeremiah 42:5-6
Then Jeremiah went to pray and after 10 days God answered Him. God commanded the people to remain in Israel and not to go to Egypt as they intended to. If they stayed, then God would protect them but if they left, then God would surrender them to disasters.
And guess what? They decided that Jeremiah had told them a lie. And they went off with their original plan. And if we continue reading the book we will find out how God surrendered Egypt (and the people of Israel) to Babylon.
There are two sins that brought God’s anger towards them:
1. Disobedience/disbelieve
It was very clear that they had been warned over what would happen if they went with their plan. But they didn’t believe in God’s word through His prophet.
2. Lie
Although this might not be so obvious, but they did tell a lie. They said that whatever God’s will was they would follow even though it was in contrary of what they wanted. But in reality, when God’s will was not according to what they wanted, they disobeyed it.
I guess there are one main thing that I learned from this passage, especially cause it is one that I think applies to everyone of us, Christians. Most of the time we, Christians, are just like the Israelites. We pray for God’s will to be revealed to us and for it to be done over our own will. But deep inside our heart most of the time we already have a set of mind and often we only wish to hear God confirm what we want. How many times do we say, “God, let Your will be done. But again, if it is okay I want it this way.”? Well, I am not saying that it is wrong to express what we want in front of God but sometimes we repeat things over and over again, showing how in fact that is what we want to be done. And when God says no, we rebel.
One of the resolutions that I made around a month ago during the seminars that we had for Christian leaders, my first one, actually says this: ‘Resolved, to make God’s will mine.” pardon the language if it might sound a bit weird, but basically I wish that I can be shaped little by little so that I can really go with His will in everything I do. Not just accepting His will half heartedly, but when God’s will become our will as well, we accept this full heartedly with no doubt that He knows what He is doing and that His plan is flawless.
I was reminded by this passage that we ought to keep looking for God’s will and it is our duty to surrender and follow that now matter what it is, even though it is not what we want. As Christians, one thing we should learn is to have our mind little by little transformed to be more like the mindset of Christ – His will becoming ours too, for we know that He holds tomorrow.
The End September 1, 2008
Posted by .F in myPictures.add a comment
= The End =
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Photographer: me
Location: somewhere in Melbourne
Editings:
Cropped
Sepia effect
Levels adjusted
Framed & Signature
One thing I wish I have had in this picture is more focus on the bird. Maybe I was taking the picture in quite a rush at the time. It was taken last year at the end of winter – beginning of spring (that’s why the title is so). I don’t do sepia a lot basically because I don’t always like how the color turns out but I like how it gives a more melancholy feeling to this picture.
I put up the picture because it’s already around that time of the year! I can’t wait to see more flowers bloom around so I can take more pictures. Although I do pity those who have hay fevers, I guess I should make full use of this time before I get one as well :p
